頑皮小妹妹改過自身(behavioral management)

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水老師's 的頭像

上門教畫, 遇上特別頑皮或個別家長有某些要求或期望的機會較多.
水老師偏愛挑戰難度, 及很想幫一把.
上次提及這個4歲半的聰明小女孩, 因太頑皮, 騷擾同學仔及動手, 被罰隔離, 整堂獨自坐在一邊靜思己過(水老師是經家長同意及由家長提出的).
幸好這家長很明事理, 及很用心教她, 水老師在上那一堂前也曾跟她媽媽談過她的問題, 及建議了一些管教的方法.
晚上媽媽教她致電給我道歉, 但我仍有少許擔心這小女孩是否真的明白...
隔了一個星期, 今次上課, 我照樣笑臉迎接她, 她歡欣地叫我早晨, 整堂也很合作, 沒有粗暴行為反而輕聲說話, 很用心地完成畫作.
水老師好開心, 心內有點感動到想哭...
我當然有讚她, 還說下一堂會奬她們糖果.

今堂是創作為主, 教她們用圓及方形畫成不同東西. 這小女孩真的有天份, 只有4歲半的她有創意, 有個人風格, 這個構圖是她自己設計的, 用四方形手工顏色紙畫成花, 用色及構圖全部是她自己創作, 真的好叻女. 如不好好管教, 實在是浪費了她的天份.

其實我是想以奬罰分明的方法, 引導她自己改變行為, 這是"behavioral modification"的常用方法. 好的行為要鼓勵, 明確地讚她奬她(reinforcement). 壞的行為要減少及停止, 不是只用大聲打駡, 是拿走一些她喜歡的事物, 這小女孩很愛繪畫, 不讓她畫對她來說已是罰.

我仍看見有些家長為了要即時控制情況, 喝駡小朋友, 其實只能治標不能治本, 小朋友很聰明有思想(尤其是頑皮的多數有小聰明), 心中根本不服, 日積月累, 到長大些會更反叛. 而且小朋友是海綿, 周遭發生的事在不知不覺中學習了, 日後他/她也可能會像你用大聲喝駡或強權來解決問題啊. 其實兒女性格像父母, 除了可能是遺傳, 很大原因是在日常生活中潛移默化的, 所以要好好安排及選擇小朋友周遭會接觸的人和事, 最重要是身教.
這是水老師的心得, 在此和大家分享一下.

1 response to "頑皮小妹妹改過自身(behavioral management)"

1. Re: 頑皮小妹妹改過自身(behavioral management)

Teaching children how to paint will enable them to discover any hidden talent within them. - Marla Ahlgrimm

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